The Sacred Search...

Thursday, January 15, 2015

News Flash...I still know not a darn thing about dating.
Well, other than it is down right terrifying.
#CanIGetAnAmen  #FromSomeoneWhoIsActuallyInTheDatingWorld

In high school, I was not an athlete. I could not hold or carry a tune nor do I have any right to be on a stage. So, I guess my thing was studying. How pathetic does that sound? It's true though. I focused on my grades and I spent a lot of time studying. Such was true in college too. Of my fondest college memories, were my times spent with one of my very best friends cramming at the library...usually with a pizza, lots of diagrams, diet coke, and a whole lot of laughter.

Given that I know not a darn thing about dating, I decided it was time to start studying. 
To prepare...myself and my very tender heart. If that is even possible. 
At least to read up on the subject matter.  

Insert the most happiest of dances when I borrowed the book The Sacred Search.

Twas' so good! I read parts aloud for my roomie (God bless her sweet and patient soul), added post-it notes to about every other page, summarized sections for anyone who would listen, and then ended up ordering my very own copy.  I mean honestly, this book had me looking at my failed marriage from about 29,302,435,438 angles and left me feeling...dare I say...somewhat excited about my future spouse. I know right!

Since we are looking ahead and not behind, I'll spare the ways in which I analyzed my past but give ya the two things that keep replaying in my head from my read. Really, it's 4,839,483 things but you just gotta read it for yourself {if you are unmarried that it..but if you are not, he does write on marriage and parenting but I can't speak to those just yet}. 

Let's do this...

Marry someone who you want your children to become. 
Um, yes. It makes perfect sense. Character, drive, integrity, spirit. If you don't want your future littles to grow up to become like your potential spouse, red flag.  How have I never considered this? Noted.

Marry for who the person is and not for who you intend for them to become. 
Sounds odd, but again it just clicked.  Someday they will or someday they won't.  "Someday they will share my ___ {faith, desire for a family, vision for the future} they are just in a season of uncertainty." "Someday they will outgrow or stop ______." Friends, someday may never come. If it is important, don't compromise because you see potential, you have history, or because you expect it from them. Marriage is not a magic wand. They may "never come around" because it is not who they are. Marry for who they are and not who you think they can be, should be, or will become. Again, duly noted.

And the last chapter of the book was about having your bestie prescreen all potential dates. 
It's her roll to wean out all the creepers, if ya will. 
{That part was just in the abridged version in my head, but I'm down if someone takes on the dirty work for me.}

 Anyone have any other good reads they recommend? 
Study up and let's do this!

Ushering in 2015...

Thursday, January 1, 2015

It came in like a wrecking ball...ha. I couldn't help myself.

Oh 2014, forever the year most notably marked by the ending of my marriage and the word that still makes my stomach churn...divorce.  But, much to my surprise, 2014 brought it's A game.  Big things happened. Big, big things and a whole lot of healing. 

The top six events that made 2014 good for the soul:
 (in chronological order because duh, #TypeA)

I acquired roomies! 
I wasn't sure how the transition from suddenly living on my own to suddenly having two of my sisters living with me would go. But as it turns out, it has been a huge blessing.

A day marked by sadness was filled with joy as my family and friends gathered to celebrate my beloved daughter. Forever celebrated she will be.

The tranquility of the open, hiking, rafting, and just being together did my heart good.
 (well maybe not the rafting part)

Um, I went to the Philippines. It was undoubtedly a trip I will never forget. I am still in awe of the way in which it came together. 

It was a big day. A big day that came for them and I could not be more proud. 
Welcome to our crazy fam, Chase. 

We started from ground zero, as in being able to run 0 miles, and completed all 13.1! 

What a good year it was indeed! 


I'm not big on New Year's Resolutions. For me, it is just one more area to judge my worth based on my own standards. And I am certain I would start strong but inadvertently fail. Rather than a list of musts, I dream big with my yearly bucket list. There is no failing when it comes to the bucket list, just dreams that I focus on before my next birthday. If they don't pan out, I don't fail. If they do, I celebrate.

In place of a resolution, I pick a word. For 2014, it was hope. To seek out and reflect on how hope was prevailing. And it sure did.  The word for 2015 that keeps coming to mind is intentional. With my time, with my resources, and with my relationships, I want to be intentional.  Present, aware, and invested.

Here is to 2015.
Bring it.

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